Apparently there is a site called GeeksareSexy or (GAS) .com, which apparently is hosting a “How To” writing contest for Geeks. Thanks to Perfomancing for pointing out this contest, here is my stab at it:
How To Be a Geek and Get Your Sexual Groove On
First Free Your Self-Esteem Issues:
- Male or Female there are plenty of similar people out there, so if you’re a geek and she’s a geek, there’s a good chance you’re both horny
- I learned this too late, as most people do: if you have a crush on a girl there’s always a 1 in 10 chance she could have a slight inkling towards you.
- Regarding your body: Fat, Skinny, Crooked Penis, Saggy Boobs, moles, webbed-feet. Obviously don’t mention any of this in the first few dates, if there is a connection there’s a connection. Everybody has something wrong with them, the physical ones are the easiest to forget about. Personality is what counts when you’re upon equals.
- Internet Dating Sites and Dating Services are an option, but not always the first and/or last option. Try it out, these people are just as horny as you!
Second, getting the opposite/same sex to notice you:
- Timing… timing is a mo-fo-btch! However, it controls our lives. Either way, if there is an opportunity, Go for it! Be funny… Everyone likes to laugh. Don’t over due it though, no one likes a show off either.
- Everybody wants to be romanced. Say nice things, but don’t be creepy. Timing is the ultimate guiding rule for everything, so if there is a lull, say you have very nice eyes or I really like your laugh, if she/he responds poorly, move on to something funny (but try not to be a bad-mouther to be funny at other people’s expense, unless it’s a teacher, politician or celebrity).
Third, Making the first moves:
- Massage and touching: I’ll give away my secret, caressing the opposite sex (back/shoulders/legs) is a tell tale sign of what the person is thinking. Once again timing is most important, so wait for an opportunity.
- Gauge the Response: start slow, shoulder massage, hand next to the leg (if you’re sitting), then push the boundaries (in non-sexual areas first), hit areas that are close but not obvious!
- So Close and a cigar? If the other person is enjoying whatever you are doing at this point, you are in! Either move towards the neck and try and turn her to a kiss OR be dirty and make a move to a sexual area. Smooth though.
Finally, realize that it works and that Geeks have a lot of sex:
- At Cornell University, there were plenty of geeks finding other geeks and falling in love or at least getting some A** on a regular basis. I mainly think this was due to repressed sexual tension from high school. However, it also stems from the fact that you’re around, you’re nice and you have the same sexual tension that the other person has.
- Even in high school the “geeky” cliques broke off and hooked up
- I am proof that Geeks get a lot of lovin.
- The Revenge of the Nerds Movie
Now that you know how to be a Geek and get some loving, I’ll leave it to another person to enter in “How To Be a Geek and Stay in a Long Term Relationship”…
Congrats on first place in that contest. You give geeks everywhere something to aspire to. Scary, eh?