Gaggle of drunk women to friend with tiara: Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!
Wasted stranger dude: Happy biiirthday, dear whoever-the-fuck-you-are!–C train
Bimbette: Look, it’s not like I mind tall, dark, and handsome, but it’s like, ‘Look at me — I’m hot… I should be able to nab a nerd.’
Friend: Nerds aren’t like shoes — you can’t just try them on for size. They have feelings, too.
Bimbette: And glasses.–34th & Lex
Tourist: Could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
NYer: No, but I could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant.–23th & 5th
Dude on motorcycle handing rose to girl: A beautiful rose for a beautiful lady.
Girl: Ew. –W 4th St




















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