Man to friend: I wonder if that dingleberry fell out of my ass yet.–Rockefeller Center
Girl on cell: All I heard all night was, ‘Oh my god, that’s Rachel. I used to date her sister’s roommate!’ And, ‘Oh my god, that’s Evan. Her brother went to camp with my ex-girlfriend’s cousin!’ I’m either gonna have to learn how to fake-play Jewish geography, or find myself some non-Jewish friends… Yes, I realize neither of those is possible.–33rd & 7th
Chick to another: She’s a weed-smoking, modern orthodox girl. I mean, I don’t think she goes to her rabbi’s high, but…–Brooklyn Museum
AND This is what I Overheard in my elevator at work:
Big Black Guy in Elevator (on Cell): Shit girl, you just bein’ paranoid. White people aren’t out to get you…. Nah… You bein’ paranoid… nah, the only people I hate are Fat people. — My Office Building’s Elevator!
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